Are you open minded or close minded?

Minds, like parachutes, only work when open.
— Anonymous

Sure we may be set in our ways of doing things, especially the older we get, but sometimes it is good to open your mind to new things. How can you experience life to the fullest if you remain inside your box?

For example, I took a cooking class in college. On our first night there we were asked to try a bite of each sample she put out to see if we could guess what it was. Some of the food did not look like I would like it, but I was open to the idea of trying new things. This girl who sat at my table had to make a negative remark with each sample she tried. I knew she wasn't going to come back to class because she wasn't ready to open her mind to new food experiences. Guess what? She never came back after that class. I, on the other hand, was able to try new foods that we cooked in class and found some things that I now like to eat. If I had been close minded to the experience I would have lost out on new knowledge I learned during the course as well as some new foods that I have added to my pantry.

As someone who has been in the errand and concierge industry for close to a decade, I don't shut my mind to new ideas because of my length of experience. I actually encourage people to share their ideas and experiences with me. I have found many new ideas, tools, and technology that I have implemented over the years because I opened my mind to new ideas on how things are getting done or how to do things differently. This has continued to help my business grow and expand to new avenues for me.

What is the worst thing that can happen if you open your mind? Nothing. You can try a new idea or food or technology and find out that it doesn't work for you, but at least you can say that you tried. That's all that counts. Close your mind to the negative thoughts that want to get in, but keep it open for all of the new and positive things you should let in.

Pack rat coming through

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
— Steven Wright

I was at a meeting yesterday and was talking with a fellow industry member and learned that she does a lot of organizing. We were discussing some of the clients she has and learned about one client she has who has things everywhere. She mentioned that when it is time to clear the clutter, the client is hesitant to throw things away.

I subscribe to a couple of newsletters related to organizing to help me with my business and to learn new information. I have picked up several tips over the years to help me with decluttering my own home. I just wish I could implement them at my mother's house. She has things she holds onto with the idea that she might need it in the future, whenever that is.

My husband and I were cleaning out our garage and I took a good look at some things we had and decided that if I hadn't been asking for it for a while that we would get rid of it. We ended up dumping a lot of things and I felt no shame or regrets in doing so. I actually felt lighter because I didn't have this heap of things hanging over my shoulder.

I have seen news reports over the years where the police have had a hard time rescuing people from their homes or retrieving them once they were found dead because there was so much stuff in the house that they couldn't get to them so easily. I guess they were creative in the ways they came up with to find space for all of the items that they brought into their homes, but I couldn't live in a home where I couldn't see out the windows or move around so easily because things were everywhere or I couldn't invite people over because there was no room for them.

When you die, you can't take everything with you, so why build up your treasures now to the point of overflowing?

Have you had your nap today?

No day is so bad it can't be fixed with a nap — Carrie Snow

I have dealt with many bad things that have happened along the way in both my personal and business life. Some of those days you just want to throttle someone or you feel as if any and every thing that can go wrong that day will. How do you deal with it? For me, I don't want to have a mental breakdown or find myself in jail because I took my anger out on the person who deserved it. My next best thing is to take a nap. I have this cool eye mask that I bought myself. When I need a good nap to clear my mind, I turn off the TV, all of the lights, put on my mask, and go to sleep. Once I have tossed and turned for a while, because I am still thinking about what happened that day, I go into my zone and rest comfortably. When my nap is over, I feel refreshed and ready to start anew. It doesn't mean that the incident never occurred earlier in the day or that the problem went away, it just means that I can deal with it better in a right frame of mind.

Naps can not be all that bad. My dog takes them all of the time and my youngest son loves to take them. He even stole my eye mask and I have the pictures to prove it.

Fact or fiction?

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything. — Mark Twain

My kids have broken things over the years and then tried to blame it on someone else. I question them and they give me their story. I do a little bit of investigating to see if their story would match the circumstance involved. Sometimes they don’t, so I go back to the kid and ask for their story again. This time it changes a little bit because they can’t quite remember what they told me the first time. Once I ask them questions about things that don't match, they then concoct a different version of what happened. At this point I call them out on the fact that they are lying and after I give them those evil “You better tell me the truth or else” eyes, I get the truth.

Why lie in the first place? You’re going to get caught eventually unless you can remember all of the lies you told. I’ve seen it time and time again. Either in the news where someone murders someone and by the time they go down the story has changed a dozen times or when a guy gets caught cheating because he couldn’t remember what he told all of the girls.

If you run a shady business, your lies will catch up to you and you could lose everything. I just dealt with someone whose lies caught up with her yesterday. My ECSU™ business partners and I had hired a woman to create some marketing materials for us. She had asked for the full amount up front, which I felt funny about doing, but because she was friends with one of my partners and I had seen her work before, we went ahead and paid her all of the money that would have been owed.

First, we had asked for three proofs and never received them. Then she gave us one thing to look at and it was not our vision. We kept going back to her for adjustments and corrections. We had given her a deadline to have the items completed by. That deadline came and went with no products ready. We finally gave up and decided to ask for our money back. We filed a claim and waited to hear word on the outcome of the situation. After almost 30 days, I had heard on Saturday that we had lost because the review team had believed that the items were intangible because the lady had stated that the items were a service.

To say I was flabbergasted was an understatement. I couldn’t believe this was happening. I had called my partners to give them the news and had one of them get on the phone with me so that we could ask these people how this could happen. The items were clearly stated in the invoice sent to us as being tangible items. After talking with a supervisor, the situation was finally taken care of in our favor. He had to dig deep to find out that she herself had stated that the items were supposed to be printed in one of her first emails to them.

He had told us that after that email she had tried to get out of it by stating that the items were a service when they asked for a tracking number. She had tried to find some type of loophole or way to work around the system so that the case was found in her favor. In the end her lies caught up to her and she lost, not only the money she had received, which was refunded back to us, but her friendship with my partner and any new business that we would have passed her way if she had done a good job in the first place.

If you are truthful in your actions you don’t have to try and remember what your lies are.

I've had enough!!!!!!!

OK, I can't take it anymore. I understand that our youth have their styles, but I am about to lose it. I swear, if I see one more young man's underwear because he sagged his pants below his butt, I am going to pull his pants down to his ankles. And if I see one more young girl with a muffin top, the ones who try to shove their fat behinds into tiny pants and their fat has nowhere to go but up and over the top of their pants, I am going to drag them into the nearest store to buy them a pair of pants that fit.

Instead of spending your entire day pulling your pants up and your tops down to cover what's in between, you just need to find clothes that fit properly. Obviously they have to keep tugging away because they see people staring at them. You would think the snickering they hear, especially my comments that are made loud enough for them to hear, would deter them, but to no avail.

I have no shame in calling you out on it if you have no shame in wearing those ridiculous clothes. I call my son out on it in public and I do the same with his friends. I have asked my son in a public place if he had to go to the bathroom. When he asked why I replied, "Because it looks like you took a crap in your pants and it is weighing them down to your knees." Needless to say, the pants went up faster than he could walk out of the store.

My sister and I have our own fashion police thing going on between us and I guess now would be as good a time as any to make a website about these fashion blunders we see on a daily basis. Of course we would put the black bars across their eyes to protect the innocent....from having to admit that they know these people.

The only underwear I want to see from now on are mine as I am putting them on and the only muffin tops I want to see should be on the muffin I am eating. Suspenders anyone?

Aahhh...winter, spring, summer, fall

Childhood is the most beautiful of all life's seasons.
— Anonymous

Have you ever just sat in a park and watched the kids at play? Or what about people watching at Disneyland or somewhere similar? I have and I find it fascinating. Watching the looks of wonder and puzzlement when a small child comes across something new or the smile on their face when they are enjoying something they are doing is great to watch.

Whether you don't have kids or you do, and you can get beyond the crying, screaming, and acting out, childhood is beautiful. I remember when I was younger and how I could turn anything into fun. Whether it was taking a piece of paper and turning it into a fancy folded letter to one of my friends or rolling down a hill of grass and laughing the whole way down, it was a time when I could be whatever I wanted and be free of all responsibilities. OK, I still had to make my bed, but it was nothing compared to the responsibilities adults face today.

There are people out there today who try to take childhood and turn it into something ugly and dirty. Don't let them. For those of you who have children, sit where they can't see you and just watch them for a few minutes. It takes you back to your yesteryear and lets you be a part of your childhood again.

I am going to go down and buy a snow cone machine this weekend and make snow cones again with my son. The price of a snow cone may have gone up from when I sold them as a child, but the memories will always be priceless.

Who throws a wrench in your plans?

My husband did earlier this week. I led a chaotic life as it with three children and a husband. Wait...make that four children. When one of them throws me off, it can throw my whole day off. I was out taking my son to school and thought that I would plan my day smartly and take care of a few of my own errands for once.

I wanted to go in a circle and end up back at my home, like I teach others to do when running their own errand or concierge service. I went up the street and stopped at the dry cleaners. Moved through the parking lot and made a mad dash into the grocery store to pick up items to make two separate dinners. I then ran through the Post Office and went on my way home. Proud at how fast I had accomplished my errands.

I got home and called my husband to come out and grab some of the stuff from the car. He gets to the car and tells me, "Oh, I thought you had stopped by McDonald's to get some breakfast." I wanted to throw the bottle of spaghetti sauce at his head, but thought about the mess I would have to clean up afterwards and how it would throw me off schedule even more, and chose not to. I told him I would go grab some food and then he would have to come back out and empty out the rest of the car.

Although it didn't take long to complete the task of getting breakfast, the fact that it wasn't in my schedule distracted me from what I had planned. Lately, I have tried to stick to a stricter schedule because I have a lot of activities coming up this month, but it just isn't working out like I had planned. Oh heck, until I can get the kids out of the house and whack my husband over the head with my cane each time he pulls a task out of his hat, I guess I will pick up that wrench and put it in my back pocket.

Where are you looking?

Never look down on anybody unless you're helping him up.
— Jesse Jackson

OK, I admit I think I was pretty geeky in high school. I read a lot and got good grades. I also was known by everyone in school as well. Why? Because I never looked down on anyone. I hung out with the band, the punkers, the jocks, the popular people, the nerds. You name the clique, I knew at least two people from it. When I hung out with someone it was because of who they were on the inside, not on the outside.

Even when I went on to work I would hang out with a variety of people, except the group of girls I knew who never washed their hands after using the restroom. Variety is the spice of life. You never know the story behind a person's life, unless they tell you, that makes them who they are today. So why would you look down on them?

I know people in social settings tend to flock together with their own "groups", but it is always great to get out of your comfort zone and talk to someone who you would never regularly talk you. You never know what you can learn. I LOVE watching Beauty and the Geek. You will usually see the girls talking bad about the guys up front because why would they want to hang out with a geek? By the end of the show they realize that the guys aren't as bad as they thought.

Next time you come across someone you normally look down on, why not look up and see what you are missing.

Are you young or old?

The more one worries, the older one gets; the more one laughs, the younger one feels.
— Chinese proverb

Maybe the reason everyone thinks that I am younger than I am is because I laugh a lot. Just the other day my sister and I were cooking dinner for a family dinner and my mom, two sisters, and myself were standing around in the kitchen listening to the radio. We heard "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" come on and we all started singing and dancing to it. We were laughing and really enjoying ourselves.

I don't mind making a fool of myself from time to time. Now my kids will get embarrassed from time to time, but I don't care. If you can't laugh out loud, then how are you supposed to get through life? I can even sneak a dance in from time to time with my oldest son while he has the radio going in his room. Of course no one is looking because then that would not be cool, but we still enjoy ourselves.

The guys in my family all think that they are comedians, so they like to try their jokes on me. Sometimes I am laughing so hard that my eyes start to water. There are other times when something they say will set me off. Other people may not find it as funny as me, but I am the type of people who visualizes what is going on while people are explaining things to me so if I am getting this picture in my mind when they are talking to me, I can find some things pretty darn funny.

I don't mind telling people my age, which is 35, but I feel like I am 21 and holding because I enjoy life so much and what it has to offer. So if you ever find yourself in the same location as me as hear some goofball in the background, that is probably me laughing my head off at something funny someone told me. (As a hint for those attending the ICEA conference in October 2007, Jackie Farley will be a guest speaker. She is so hilarious, that you will be hearing me laughing hysterically when she gives her presentation.)

My advice to you is to stay young for as long as possible. Laugh more.

Are you lost?

Last night my mom was driving over to my house with my dad. Now earlier in the day I had given my mom directions, again, to drive over on the streets versus the freeway. I had repeated the instructions to her more than once. My dad fell asleep and during that time my mom proceeded to get lost. She spent two hours driving around in circles. Instead of pulling over and calling me when she first got lost so that I could guide her, she just kept driving around and around. Finally she called me and explained that she was lost. I told her to immediately pull over and tell me where she was. I told her to stay put and that I would go to where she was and she could then follow me back to my house. Of course we made it to my house with no problems, because I knew where I was going.

This got me thinking about some of the people I have come across who tell me that they are lost in their business. They are unsure where they are going and continue to go around in circles without really accomplishing much except using up their time and money and getting nowhere. My first response to them is to stop. If you don't know where you are going the first thing you need to do is get directions. You shouldn't ask just any person for directions, but you should ask someone who knows their way around. Once you have those directions, follow them closely. If you don't, you will end up lost again. Once you follow the directions, you should be headed on the right track to end up at your destination, which should be a successful business.

My husband hates to ask for directions, which is his prerogative, but we always end up taking longer to get to our destinations because he is so hard headed. Now on the other hand, I don't mind asking for help if I am lost. Why? I would rather put out the time or money at the beginning to get to where I am going correctly then waste my resources trying to figure it out on my own. It doesn't make me less of a person for asking, it just makes me a smarter person because I had the forethought to extend my hand out for help. People are willing to help you out, but you have to ask for it and you have to really want that help.

The next time you are headed somewhere, whether it is in your personal or business life, make sure you have directions and that you follow them or you might end up lost. Oh, and one more thing, enjoy the journey to your destination. That's always the fun part.

A positive outlook on things

Yesterday my husband and I were out in our garage doing a little spring cleaning. During that time, a few people took it upon themselves to break into our house and steal all of my oldest son's electronic toys, some of his clothes, and my husband's brand new 80 GB iPod that I had purchased for him last month. To say I was pissed off is an understatement. Did I want to string up whomever did it by their toes and make them suffer? You bet.

My son, being almost 15, tries to act hard and as if nothing bothers him. It broke my heart to see him crying and upset over the fact that some jerks decided to act in this manner. I went out and replaced his Xbox 360 and iPod, as well as my husband's iPod. Today we are going out to replenish his wardrobe. Unfortunately we thought that this could never happen to us and did not have insurance. Last night we purchased insurance for the next what if's.

As my husband and I were out yesterday to buy window locks and wood to block the sliding glass door, we went next door to Sam's Club to purchase the replacement items. As we were leaving, there was a gentleman outside the exit door selling See's Candy bars. My husband told the gentleman, "We were robbed today. Why not bring some goodness to our day." So we purchased a few bars of candy.

The gentleman started telling us that we can't always help the bad things that happen to us, but that God will never give us more than we can handle and there is a purpose for things happening the ways they do sometimes. I thanked him for the candy and his time and went on my way.

Although I couldn't change the fact that someone had come into my home and violated my peace of mind and the security of my home, I could change how I looked at the situation. I could have chosen to dwell on it and build up hate, anger, and all kinds of other feelings that would make my stomach churn and make me feel ill. I chose to set aside the events of the day and move on with life. My husband took my oldest son to the movies and the rest of us had pizza delivered and watched TV. OK, my daughter was on the phone with her boyfriend, but at least she was back to herself.

By looking at the positive side of things, such as no one was hurt, we can take these life lessons and build on them.

Do you bargin shop?

A bargain is something you can't use at a price you can't resist.
— Franklin P. Jones

OK, I have to admit, I have used coupons in the past. Sunday mornings I would be up at the crack of dawn with my newspaper on my lap as I watched food cooking shows from my bed and clipped coupons. Then, on Tuesdays and Wednesdays I would spend my time going through the grocery ads to compare my coupons to their sales. I do have to brag a little though. I once had $300 worth of groceries in my cart and only paid $75 for them after all of my coupons and store card was used. Not bad, not bad. The thing though was that it took a lot of my time to compile my list for the week and sometimes I would buy things I may not have really needed just because they were a bargain.

How about some of you who visit garage sales and yard sales looking for the perfect bargain? My in-laws like checking them out. Although they didn't always buy something, there were times where they bought something and then didn't want it only to talk my husband into taking it. If it was a bargain they didn't use, what makes you think I wanted their bargain?

Many people get caught in the different specials that are offered at stores, restaurants, and many other places. If I think I am going into bargain frenzy, I stop and look at the item and wonder whether it really is something that I need or will use. I could walk out with free or highly discounted items all of the time, but I don't want to become a pack rat hoarding my bargains.

I keep a folder for coupons I think that I may use, such as a fast food coupon or a coupon from a retail store for something I was planning on buying. At the end of the week, if I haven't used it yet, it gets tossed. After all, if I didn't use it in that one week time frame, then I really didn't plan on using it in the first place. I do keep a small set, about 4-5, of coupons in my purse for stores that I may frequent. This way, if I decide last minute that I want to go there, the coupon is ready for me to use.

My advice to you is to do two things when out shopping. 1. Make a list and stick to it. Otherwise... 2. Resist.

How do you get creative?

My ideas usually come not at my desk writing but in the midst of living.
— Anais Nin

I have to admit that I am a very creative person. I love to make things for people, put parties together, cross stitch, and do so many different creative things. Even in my business I have been very creative, whether it has to do with solving a client's not so usual errand request, dealing with an unhappy customer, or even putting together my products I sell.

I have days where I sit at my desk thinking of things to write and my mind stalls. Then I start to think about something I saw, tasted, felt, touched and my living in that moment draws inspiration. Just the everyday things I experience could create some really great stories, although with my life, the real ones can sometimes seem unbelievable.

I have always told family and friends that if they were to put a camera in my home and follow my family around, people would watch and I could make lots of money. My youngest son has such a sharp wit and quizzical mind that sometimes my mouth hurts from laughing so hard. I think I could make lots of money writing about my daughter and her friends because their lives are just one big soap opera. My oldest son, well let's just say that I could right a behavioral book on what makes teenage boys just downright crazy. (That puberty is just killing me.)

Whether you are looking at ideas on what services to offer in your business, party ideas, or whatever other ideas you need, draw on what should inspire you the most...Life.

What are your priorities?

Sometimes we get caught up in this game we call life and then when it is time to finish the game we realize all of the spots on the game board that we missed. I have been extremely busy the last few months and have not had a lot of down time with the kids, even though we fit pieces in here and there each week.

My husband felt that we needed some more family time together, without their friends, so we headed down to Disneyland. We got there early and jumped on all kinds of rides. My youngest son and I jumped on the Mad Hatter Tea Cups and I spun us around until I couldn't get us to go any faster. We were laughing and having so much fun. My daughter and I hit up the tortilla factory and sourdough bread factory at Disney's California Adventure. I have been to both places many times, but each time is a different experience with the person you are with. I really enjoyed having my kids be the only priority for the day.

The song "If Tomorrow Never Comes" by Garth Brooks brings home your priorities. The chorus of the song says:

If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
And she must face the world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes

Our world as we know it is changing. Just look at the tragedy that hit Virginia Tech. We need to sit down and decide what we want to do and what we need to do. Find all of those things that can be delegated or outsourced and give them up so that we can take care of the things that are truly our priority. I have been saying "No" a lot more lately because I don't want to be tied down to things I don't want to do and have them take away from the things I want to do.

Like Tim McGraw says in his song "Live like you were dying." Whether your priority is making sure everyone eats together at the dinner table each night or being there when your little one attends their first day of kindergarten or saving enough money to purchase your first home, it is up to you to take care of those priorities.

What gifts have you received?

Each day comes bearing its own gifts. Untie the ribbons.
— Ruth Ann Schabacker

Every day that you are able to wake up is a gift in of itself. The rest of the day's gifts are just an added bonus. These gifts can be big or small, physical or intangible. These gifts can be something you have been waiting for or a complete surprise.

There was a movie premiere being promoted by a local radio station that I attended with my husband and daughter. My husband went up and was moving his rump to get prizes, and while my daughter and I were trying to hide from embarrassment, I have to admit we did get a good laugh and were able to enjoy a good movie together. The gift was time spent with family.

I was out yesterday and in a hurry to get a few things done. I was hoping that I wouldn't have to drive around in circles looking for a spot. As I pulled into the parking lot, there were several spots to choose from, which was a great gift to begin with, but then I was able to get one that was close to the door.

My kids have been home on and off with spring colds. My oldest was the only one home with me one day and I played hooky from work. We went and ate lunch at a local restaurant and I we talked about different things going on in his life. Considering that most teenagers run when they see their parents coming, it was a nice and refreshing gift I received that day.

My mom is a huge Doo Wop fan. She had mentioned to me a while back about some CD's that she had really wanted, but that they were close to $200 for the pack. I happened to see an infomercial about them. I ordered them this past weekend and she will have a wonderful gift in her mailbox shortly. There was no special reason for them. They were a 'just because' gift.

Look around you today and everyday. There are gifts everywhere for you. You just have to untie the ribbons.

What are your hopes and dreams?

Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come.
— Anne Lamott

Many people like to say, "Don't get your hopes up." I have always wondered why. Hope is what had guided me through many days when I was told that I couldn't do something. Every morning you get a new chance to do the right thing. Your hopes are what help guide you in the right direction.

People hope for many things: to win the lottery, to stick around long enough to see their grandchildren, to get through life without too many sick days, to find the perfect person to marry, to build their dream home, and the list can continue for years and years. Hope is that thing deep down in your heart that if nurtured enough with dreams and playing a fair game will grow and come to fruition.

My hope is for my children to become loving, responsible adults. By trying to do my best in raising them, my hope may just come true. I'll admit then when they were toddlers and now that they are teenagers I have my moments of doubt, but my overall feelings are that they are great kids trying to get through life and each compliment I receive only strengthens my hopes.

My mom's hope is to see all of her grandchildren graduate from high school. She has had several health issues, but we always push her to do the right thing when it comes to eating, taking her medication, and exercising so that her hopes see the dawn.

Don't let any of your hopes sit in the dark.

How do you spend your time?

It's how we spend our time here and now, that really matters. If you are fed up with the way you have come to interact with time, change it.--Marcia Wieder

Since we are given only one chance to spend the time we have in our time account, we need to spend it wisely. As babies, we spent most of our time sleeping or eating, but that was good enough for us. When we were toddlers and young children, our best use of time was playing with our friends or running around the neighborhood. I spent a lot of my time reading, which is a habit that has followed me through my life.

When we were pre-teens and teenagers, we wanted to spend our time getting out of homework, hanging out with our friends, and pretending that our parents didn't exist. (Parents are so embarrassing to be seen with as I am learning now from my own kids.)

Then we hit adulthood. Time doesn't seem to stop as it used to. Instead it seems to keep flying by. Pretty soon a year has passed before you know it, then five, then a decade, and then all of a sudden your kids are grown up and you wonder where time went. There were so many things you didn't get to do or that you were planning on doing, but now there is no time left.

With the hectic lifestyles created by technology and all that it affords, people have become fed up with time because there just isn't enough of it anymore. Everyone wants to squeeze in a few hours more into the day only to end up exhausted and have to start the cycle over the next day.

Outsourcing is a great word. I take advantage of it whenever and wherever I can. I have the grocery store deliver my groceries, I bank online, I have the Post Office send me my mailing supplies, I take advantage of the office supply stores shipping to my home what it is that I need, I have take out food delivered when I can, and the list could go on and on.

Why do I do this? So I can spend the time I would have used completing these tasks myself doing what I want to do and not what I need to do. That includes reading a new book, taking a nap, watching TV, taking the kids out, working on my business, and even just sitting there doing absolutely nothing.

People work long hours to be able to purchase things that they can't enjoy because their interaction with time does not mesh well. They need to change their ways, but many people are stuck in the mindset that they need to do everything themselves and don't want to look at outsourcing to help them out, whether it is in the form of an errand service, family helping out, or using the web to take care of things. They wait until something drastic happens in their lives for them to take a look at their priorities with time and for others it is too late.

Look at the 24 hours you have everyday and make changes so that your interactions with time really matter.

Do you need hand holding for everything?

As business owners, we do need some handholding, but we also need to learn how to survive on our own at some point. I recently was told about a situation where a person had expected extensive hand holding in order to get a certain portion of their business going and was upset at not receiving all of the attention they somehow felt they deserved. They took actions against the other person in very childish ways.

As grown ups, we sometimes don't get what we want or what we feel we deserve. This doesn't allow you to go out of your way to harm others or cause damage to their reputation or character. As business owners, we need to learn to take charge and take advantage of any information we come across.

For example, if you have been offered opportunities for training, take notes and listen. Don't just sit through the training and then expect your trainer or mentor to hold your hand afterwards because you won't take the initiative to use the information you learned and implement it. How do you expect to your business to be a success if you act this way?

I remember when I was first learning how to ride a bike. I was scared at first and wanted my dad to hold the back of my bike so I wouldn't fall. He let go and I fell down. I cried, but then I got back on my bike and kept trying until I was able to take off on my own. I listened to what my dad had told me to do and implemented the information. I learned how to ride that bike within 30 minutes.

In business, you will not always be able to implement everything you learn that fast, but you have to be able to get out there and try what you learned until you get it right. Just as a small child grows up holding their parent's hand until they reach the age of 18, they then need to let go and try to do things on their own.

If you have been holding someone's hand for too long, let go.

Are you a people pleaser?

He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.
— Raymond Hull

Are you ones of those people who bends over backwards to please everyone? If you are, then you are shorting yourself. I try to always go the extra mile for my clients, but there is a line I draw. Why? There are always people who will be grateful for what you do for them and then there are others who just expect it.

Many people are afraid to say "No" when people ask them to do things. They don't want to be the one to disappoint someone else, but what about when you are disappointed? Most people pleasers suck it up and think that they will eventually be able to make everyone happy.

It is one thing to want to make sure your family, friends, and clients are happy, but it is definitely another thing when you allow people to walk all over you. I had a client who I had done everything I could to make her happy. I had forgiven her several times when she flaked on me, I tried to be accommodating to her schedule, and I finally got fed up.

One of my professors told me that it is OK to fire your clients if they are not contributing to your business. I am one of those types of people who does not like confrontations and I try to stay below the radar. I was really afraid to fire her. I felt bad that I might hurt her feelings. After two months I finally got up the nerve to fire her. Guess what? I didn't feel bad afterwards. Instead I felt relief.

I still will do little things here and there to make someone feel better, but I have learned my boundaries and where I will draw the line on pleasing people. What are your boundaries?

How to stay young!

I received this in an email and totally believe it's true.

1. Try everything twice. On Madams tombstone (of Whelan's and Madam) she said she wanted this epitaph: Tried everything twice...loved it both times!

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. (Keep this in mind if you are one of those grouches.)

3. Keep learning: Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain get idle. "An idle mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's!

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. And i f you have a f riend who makes you laugh, spend lots and lots of time with HIM/HER.

6. The tears happen: Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. LIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love: Whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

11. Forgive now those who made you cry. You might not get a second time.

Lost time can never be found!